dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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