her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Randomize
