I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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