Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Randomize