Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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