okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
