let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Randomize