Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
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