Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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