I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
