i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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