omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize