dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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