Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
did you just send me my own nude
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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