Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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