I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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