Hey man sorry I got all grabby
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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