Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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