They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
