Sry I called you an 8
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
