I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
