They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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