I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
