so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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