OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
He keeps bees of course he's weird
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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