Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
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