You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
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