I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
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