Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
