he thought i was a dude.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
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