did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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