For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
The Olympian is in my bed
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
