Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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