do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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