he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
