you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
