? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
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