take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Randomize