we made out on top of his cat.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Randomize
