I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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