I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Randomize