When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
