I can tuck mytits in my pants
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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