oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize
