There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
