Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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