We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I would fuck him just for his dog
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
