I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Just high enough for therapy.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Randomize