It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
