We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
